February 28, 2011 at 6:24pm
If it's not one thing, Murphy's Law will come and deliver something even worse. My wonderful computer - which has given me absolutely NO trouble in the years I've had it... worked just fine last night, but this morning gave me a "no boot sector found on hard drive" error. Yikes!
My first thought - Oh no! My novel! Granted, the novel is saved on there - in its final edit form... but I have copies of it saved elsewhere - so that is somewhat easily recoverable. Annoying, but not disastrous.
My next thought - All my work for my incomplete from last semester - for my favorite instructor - which consists of 5 or 6 sets of short essay answered discussion questions, all my research for the final research paper, the rough draft of that paper, along with another essay are all ONLY saved on that hard drive. One file folder. In one location. I am so worried that it will be gone. I know it's kind of silly to worry - either it is ok or it isn't and either way I have no control over the situation.
It's kind of like last night. Last night was rough. But I had to buck up and deal with it. There was no option for alleviating the pain, so I had to find a way to work through it. No control over the situation. It's scary to not have control over something as fundamental as one's own body. I realized that when I let my mind go still and accept that this is how things are, I am able to somehow move past the pain, at least enough to be able to function. I guess that relinquishing control can sometimes actually be a means of regaining control. Or maybe it's all an illusion.